What? No Way

June 8, 2013

Have you heard the new song out called heart attack by Demi Lavato? Ok I’m not sure how new it is, but we had never heard it until we moved here 5 weeks ago. The first time Andrew and I listened to it he said,”I’m pretty sure she just said,’I’m putting my defenses up, cause I don’t want to fart aloud, if I ever did that I think I’d have a heart attack.” We seriously thought these were the lyrics. We turned the section up every time it came on and we continually came to the conclusion that’s what she was saying. Eventually I looked it up and the actual lyric is ” cause I don’t want to fall in love.” To be perfectly honest I think Andrew’s version makes more sense and you better believe we belt that made up line every time it plays on the radio. I also thought she said, “playing with a kindle,”to which Andrew corrected it to Ken Doll. What is wrong with people’s diction? If you’ve never heard the song you can listen to it HERE. If you do know the song I apologize if I just ruined it for you forever.

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DQ

September 6, 2012

That’s what I like about Texas??? That is the commercial down here. Every Dairy Queen commercial ends with the phrase “DQ, that’s what I like about Texas.”. They serve tacos at the DQs down here too! It’s funny that Texans think Dairy Queen is only in Texas and it shocks them to find out they are everywhere and no one really eats at them. Also, did you know Austin is the capital of the CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE?? Haha yeah, you gotta love Texans!!

How Does it Come Out?

March 10, 2012

The other day I was babysitting my 4 and 2 year old and I made one little mistake.  I told them that in a couple weeks we were going to find out if our baby was a boy or a girl.  Then they looked at me kind of funny and I realized they probably thought I meant I was going to have a baby in a couple weeks.  I then explained that I wouldn’t be having the baby, the doctor was just going to be telling me if it was a boy or a girl, then the conversation went something like this.  We’ll call the 4 year old J.

J: Well how will they know if it’s a boy or a girl if you aren’t going to have the baby?

Me: Well they use a tool that can see inside my belly.

J:  But babies don’t have hair yet so how can they tell if it’s a boy or a girl?

Me: Umm, well, let’s see uh do you think boys and girls are made the same way, that we have ALL the same parts? (J has a puzzled look on his face at this point) Ok how about this, let’s get the book Amazing You and we’ll talk about it.  I proceed to explain in the technical terms what different parts girls and boys have and tell him the doctor will be able to see the different parts.

Ok well unfortunately when we got this book out he asked if I would read the WHOLE book.  I didn’t realize this, but mom skips over some of the parts and he really wants to know all the stuff in the book.

We get to the part about how babies are made and I’m hoping he doesn’t ask me any questions about this.  I have no real problem talking about it, but I refuse to talk to kids about it when I am not their parent!

We get to the part about when babies come out and then here it comes…

J: So how does the baby come out?

Me: Well you see that hole down there? It gets REALLY big for just one day and the baby comes out and then the hole gets small again.

J: (wide eyed) OH

And then I tried to change the subject quickly and move on.

Later I told the mom and dad about this conversation and they just laughed about it.  I’m sure I really shocked him because up until that day he had been told that the doctor takes the baby out!  This got me thinking…OH MY WORD THIS CHILD HAS TO COME OUT!!!

We were supposed to fall back on November 2nd of last year. We did on all clocks except our bathroom clock because it requires the use of a step stool to change. The rule in our house now that I’m carry another human being is if my feet leave the floor I can’t do the chore. So I asked Andrew to change the clock and he did about a week ago. It wasn’t more than a day later that we found out this weekend we spring forward! I wish you could have been there when I told him. We’ll see how long it takes to change it this time. Looking forward to more light at night!!

Quit Your Day Job!!

January 30, 2012

This is this man’s job.  He travels and sings at churches, I think he needs to seriously reconsider his profession.  It gets better and better as the video progresses and the very end doesn’t really disappoint either.  ENJOY!

Elf on the Shelf

December 7, 2011

I have strong feelings about Elf on the Shelf, but for once on this blog I am going to tastefully edit my own mind and not share them with you.  I do however want to share THIS with you.  It’s Lil Blue Boo’s Elf on the Shelf R-Rated version.

Imagine Christmas Morning

November 30, 2011

Warning:  As it’s nearing December I’ll probably get heavy on the Christmas posts.  In most ways I agree with the phrase, “It’s the most wonderful time of the year,” so prepare yourself for some Christmas cheer up in here!

I meant to do a video for this post while visiting my parent’s house this past week, but then I ran out of time so these pictures below will have to suffice.  My dad’s parents were big collectors.  They thought that they would try to pass on the love of collecting to their grandchildren, it didn’t work, especially for me, I don’t collect and I don’t have any plans to do so ever.  I purge, I sell, I toss, I donate, I don’t collect.  My brother Bryan got smokers (cool, but not cool when you are a kid), my brother Kevin got Nutcrackers (again same scenario), and I got EFFANBEE dolls, yep that’s pronounced just like it’s spelled.  Now you are getting the picture of why I wanted to do a video, right? We would open these gifts every year at Christmas and pretend that it was a really cool gift.  Lucky for me in the early years when pretending was harder they gave me dolls that were pretty, their eyes opened and closed and they were storybook characters, here is Goldilocks:

Sorry for the blurry photo

I know what you are probably thinking…oh that’s not bad, you were a little girl and you got a doll.  You’re right, not too bad, but then you are told that it’s a doll to look at not to play with and so the only redeeming quality about it was ripped from you.  These all either stayed in the box or were displayed in a cabinet for my entire life and still are today.  Goldilocks, Snow White, Mother Goose, and the list goes on of storybook characters that my mom is so graciously storing at her house until I have a house large enough to store the things.

Fast forward to later in life, the dolls got creepier and creepier as the years went on.  One year I opened this little guy up, you tell me how a 12 year old acts excited about this gift…

Huck Finn...every girls dream

And then, it took a turn for the worst, this doll below is what horror films are made of…

Cue Creepy music, it's Mark Twain in case you aren't familiar with what he looks like!

If they were worth anything I would definitely be selling these right now and paying off our new couch, but they are currently not even worth what my grandparent’s paid for them and so the collectibles will sit in a closet and collect dust until someday when I can get some money for them or when I have kids I’ll let them take them out of the boxes and play with them.  Mr. Twain will forever stay in his box however, I would hate for my little ones to have nightmares!

Friday Fun

November 11, 2011

Most of you know I have a pinterest account and that I’m an avid pinner.  Most of you however do not follow my “I wish we wanted a pet” board so I decided I would share some of the sweet animal pictures I’ve pinned lately.  Some of them are funny, some of them are cute, and all of them make me want a pet, but none of them have convinced me it’s a good idea.

The resemblance is creepy

This is a mix between a basset hound and a sharpei, it looks like a cartoon character, adorable!

The text on the picture says it all

Great Dane Puppy, I'd love to find one of these under my tree!

This is FOR REAL, and I would love to snuggle that thing

If you want to find the sources of all of these pictures you can click on my PINTEREST board to find the original sites, I do not have the energy to link it all.  Oh and on that board you will also find quite a few cute boxer pictures, imagine that!

To tie you over

October 20, 2011

or is it tide you over?  Not sure, but anyway I haven’t recorded my video for today, but I did see THIS video on the internet today and have watched it several times and have laughed every single time.  Warning:  It’s pretty loud so you might want to turn down the volume a little bit.

Coldest Photo Shoot EVER

December 11, 2010

Here are a few of the pictures that will not be making the cut for our Christmas card, but these are some of my favorites!  I’ll post our actual picture when we post our Christmas letter…hopefully we’ll get that together before December 25th!

In case you don't have facebook here's my bozo hair picture

Love that face...Andrew's that is

This would be my choice for Christmas card because it most captures our relationship, but I know people wouldn't want this on their fridge!

It was cold, 7 degrees, and we were out there with NO COATS

I like this one, but there are better ones so we won't be using this one either.

This was a mini session…it took us a total of 30 minutes start to finish and we got some good ones. Jenna is AMAZING, we appreciate her more than we could ever express!